Friday, November 24, 2006

24 NOV 06, Girl Friday is HERE







Fresh from the mall or were ever it is women like this hang out...Playboy Playmate of the Month for August 2005, Tamara Witmer stops in to say hello and shake her moneymaker.

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Thursday, November 23, 2006

It's an Anniversary!

Today, is the two year anniversary of the opening of the Camp Taji Burger King, Pizza Hut, Subway and the then new PX.

They are still there today and while the eateries are still going strong, the PX is moving kinda slow...they have anything you might need as long as that might be soda, Maxim magazines, DVDs of Hogan's Heroes or womens thong underwear. If you need just about anything else, you are SOL right now.

Today also marks the anniversary of my friend Steve trying to kick down the door of the DFAC.

It all began as Steve flew on a mission that began around 11AM on Thanksgiving day and finished up around 1800 (that's 6 PM to you civilian types). After the paperwork was finished it was off to the chow hall to get a turkey dinner because it was only 5 after 2000 now and the flier said the chow hall was to be open until 2030, right?

Well, wrong apparently, because someone made a mistake on the flier. The chow hall actually closed at 8. And as Steve soon found out, closed means CLOSED...especially to you mister.

Steve walked over to the chow hall, washed his hands and went to the door but it was LOCKED...thinking it was some kind of mistake, because after all the flier said the chow hall was open until 8:30, Steve pulled on the door a little. Seeing Steve's struggles one of the DFAC NCO's came over to help. "We're closed" he told Steve.

Steve said, "The flier said your open till 2030!"

The NCO said, "WE'RE CLOSED." and turned and walked away.

That caused Steve to become a little angry...you see his blood sugar had to be low as the the last time he had eaten was at breakfast (0800) and it was now over twelve hours later (yes I can do math too!). Steven gets a little testy when his blood sugar gets low. So to get the NCO's attention Steve rattled the locked door a little harder. This got the senior DFAC NCO's attention who came over to see what was going on. Steve explained that he had been flying all day, he hadn't eaten and would like to be admitted to get Thanksgiving dinner after all the flier said that the DFAC would be open until 2030 and it is now 2015...so you should be open.

The senior NCO said, "We're closed." and turned to walk away.

That was when Steve kicked the door...hard.

That was when the Assistant Division Commander appeared.

That was when Steve told his story for the third time and was finally given permission to enter the chow hall.

We tried to get Steve to kick the door again today for old times sake but he wasn't having any of it. Didn't see the ADC either...I guess we'll just have to make do with our processed turkey and pseudo giblet gravy...GOBBLE GOBBLE!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

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Using The "F" Word in the Chow Hall

Soldiers are notorious users of swear words, and their favorite by far is the "F" word. I have witnessed soldiers make entire sentences that used almost nothing but the word f#@k. Something like the phrase, "You should have f#@kin' seen that f@#k, he f#@kin' ran one f@#king way then he f#@king went another f#@king way and in the f#@king end we f#@king had to kill the mother f#@ker." With that in mind I would like to relate something that occurred here (in Iraq) just the other day. Please keep in mind that I generally don't swear a great deal...even over here. I would prefer to use the big words I learned in college...I've got to show something for those years and money spent.

I was sitting with one of our company commanders at the lunch table (we were going to fly a mission later on that afternoon). We were having a conversation concerning an event that happened to a couple of his soldiers a few days previous. In the course of that conversation he became rather animated and use the "F" word a few times to describe both the insurgents and some people who were trying to give his soldiers a hard time. The good Captain was honestly concerned about the welfare of his soldiers and seeing that they were and are being treated fairly. His use of the "F" word as an adjective was while technically against Army regulations, I think perfectly understandable given that we are currently in a state of war and lives not just careers are at stake.

My feeling was apparently not shared by a First Sergeant who was a few seats down sitting across from a female (rather attractive...oops not supposed to notice that) 1st LT, who looked in our direction and said, "Sir, could you watch your language?"

In retrospect he was polite enough and didn't really make a scene...so I may have over-reacted a little when I looked down at my flight suit, tore my name-tag off the Velcro, held it up, looked at it and said out loud, "Yep, it says right here US Army...I thought I was still in the Army." Nothing further was said but I knew the remark hit home by the stink-eye I received in response.

What I didn't say, but was thinking was, if you are offended by the "F"Word, Fobbit, I suggest you fly around with me for a few hours and you'll see some really offensive stuff, like IEDs, Rocket and mortar blasts and if you're really lucky you might get to see what it looks like when 30mm rips a human being apart...kinda makes the "F" word look like small potatoes when you think about it.

I wish I could go back to a time and a place where little things like the F-Word were worth the trouble of correcting someone over. Maybe our little military society is a little rough around the edges and needs to use the big words versus the 4 letter kind. But on the other hand he could be wrong and he can go FUCKING back to his FUCKING trailer and FUCKING e-mail his wife about the horrible dirty aviators he had to correct for all their foul language at the DFAC today...I mean they were swearing in front of the girl...WHAT THE FUCK, OVER?

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Saturday, November 18, 2006

America F#@K YEAH!

If you ever need an example of the kind of humor possess, just hang around a bunch of them for 5 minutes.

Apparently, we have a "Team America" fan working in our CP. On the door there is a bumper sticker someone sent over from the states that reads in part, "freedom isn't free." The phantom Team America fan inked underneath..."it costs a buck oh five"...at least it gave a few of us a chuckle on the way in.

You may have to have been there, and seen Team America. Which I don't really recommend unless its really necessary...the being here part not the movie. Well if you have a stick up your ass I wouldn't recommend the movie either, I'd recommend getting that stick out of where it doesn't belong and lighten-up because life is too short.

Sorry, the Girl Firday will be Girl Saturday or Sunday...not like too many are disappointed these days anyway.

Be Safe...it's a jungle out there!

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Friday, November 10, 2006

She's here...Girl Firday for 10 NOV 06

In light of all the teeth gnashing and carrying on of the past week, I suggest to take some time and go to your happy place and reflect on something beautiful...like Playboy Playmate Crista Nicole.











Have a great weekend...since the only way we know it's the weekend over here is to look at the calendar and it really doesn't matter because we will be doing the same thing we do every day...work.

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Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Recommended Reading

I would like to recommend a essay for you it is titled Seeing the Unseen Part 1. It's over at the blog Eject,Eject, Eject!. It's well worth your time, an excerpt is below...

I’d like to begin this sermon, if I may, by employing some of the rhetorical restraint of the BushHitler crowd and tell you about the worst case of child abuse EVER in the annals of recorded history.



I grew up on an island. I was in the water almost every day. I wanted this Polaris Nuclear Sub more than I wanted the sun to rise. I had picked out a grotto where I could keep it docked. Taking the ferry across the bay from Hamilton, I would look over the rail in anticipation of the day when I would shadow that churning wake, the periscope a thin reed lost in the foam, pursuing those fat clueless prefects into a perfect firing position and their watery graves!

And I am not alone. In finding this picture, I discovered that there are thousands of boys like myself, begging and pleading for the six dollars and ninety-eight cents it costs to build a fully functional, 7-foot, 2-man nuclear submarine that had:

•Controls that work!
•Rockets that fire!
•Real Periscope!
•Firing torpedoes!
•Electrically lit instrument panel!

I stared at this ad for months and months on end as a small boy. And though I must have read each word a thousand times, I have no memory of the phrase “sturdily constructed of 200 lb. test fibreboard!” It finally fell to my father to inform me that “200 lb test fibreboard!” is, in fact, garden-variety cardboard. My immediate response was “but wouldn’t that get all soggy out in the ocean?” And I am deeply ashamed to admit that after all that time, it is only now, in posting this on the internet at 47 years of age, that I realized for the first time that the damn Polaris Nuclear Submarine doesn’t even have a propeller.

Well, that’s seven-year-old boys for you. Had I been so inclined, I was certainly smart enough to have determined that one could not build a Polaris Nuclear Sub with missiles and firing torpedoes and all the rest for $6.98. All $6.98 would buy you in 1967 was a cardboard box painted like a submarine.

I believed it – like so many of my cohorts – because I so desperately wanted to believe it…and the X-ray Specs, and especially those damn Sea Monkeys with their little briefcases and hats and aprons. What heartless son of a bitch wrote those ads? I hope he chokes on his brine shrimp, the bastard.

We live in a sea of information, an Information Age: and yet, it has been almost half a millennia since mankind has been so unwilling or unable to use critical thinking to separate the intellectual wheat from so…much…chaff! Critical Thinking -- the ability to analyze data, determine it’s usefulness and fidelity, to learn how to assess reliability, question methodology, weigh expertise and all the rest -– is in shockingly short supply these days. It’s not just a shame; it’s an epidemic, it is a fatal metastasizing disease in a democracy where information is used by the public to make the decisions that steer the ship of state. For the ability to think critically allows us to see the unseen; to find the truth behind the falsehood, as well as the falsehood behind the truth.

Today, it seems that legions of people – growing legions – are falling victims to ideas and beliefs that on the face of it are patently false…things that are so clearly and obviously nuts that you really have to wonder what deep, mighty engine of emotional need could possibly drive a brain so deep into a hole. Seriously now, there are millions and millions of people on this planet who will torture logic and reason to mind-bending extremes in order to believe monumentally ridiculous “theories”… theories drawn from an emotional need so warped and debased that you are catapulted beyond anger and disbelief directly into pathos and the desire to call 911 before these people hurt themselves.

So perhaps we could take a walk through Fantasy Island armed only with a shotgun of logic and a few fact-filled shells and see what intellectual tumors we may safely blow into atoms. Time is short! So let’s start with the easy stuff and work our way up to the Lord God King Mack-Daddy falsehood of our age.






CHICKENHAWKS

Let’s shag a few easy fly balls to warm up, shall we?

The Chickenhawk argument goes something like this: anyone who favors military action should not be taken seriously unless they themselves are willing to go and do the actual fighting. This particular piece of work is an anti-war crowd attempt to silence the debate by ruling that the other side is out of bounds for the duration. Like all ad hominem attacks, (argumentum ad hominem means “argument against the person”) it is an act of intellectual surrender. The person who employs an ad hominem attack is admitting they cannot win the debate on merit, and hope to chuck the entire thing out the window by attacking the messenger. This is a logical fallacy of the first order, because the messenger is not the message.


For the rest go HERE!

I remember that sub too...but I never had the guts to ask for my folks to get it for me.

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Friday, November 03, 2006

How about a nice cup..


...of shut the F#@K UP! You know there's hardly been a day that's gone by lately that I haven't thought that at one time or another. Today I find the daughter of the man who posed for the poster pictured above is unhappy that someone has changed the poster from what it reads to, HOW ABOUT A NICE CUP OF SHUT THE F#@K UP!...and is making money from it.

Now I suppose one could find that kind of sentiment off putting and rude. But who among us can deny that it needs to be said, sometimes quite often. And if her Dad's image gets the message across with a little humor who's to say that this isn't as much a public service as the origional poster which he posed for in WWII?

Read all about it HERE.

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She's Back...Girl Friday, 3 NOV 06




For the first Friday in Novemebr here's Christina Smith.

For those of you who don't know...this picture could be an ad for AAFES, they promise you everything, they hint at a great pay-off and in the end you really get nothing but a tease.

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